Patient: I have fever, headache, cough and cold. I've taken some basic medicines for the same.

    Doctor: Which ones?

    Patient: Paracetamol,
    Doctor: Someone please give me an Alprazolam!

    Patient: Relax doctor. Alprazolam is an anxiolytic. It may not help you right now. You're suffering from an Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED). A selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor like Escitalopram will work better.

    Doctor: Someone give me passive euthanasia!

    Patient: Passive Euthanasia requires you to sign a 'living will' in advance. Besides, you're not even terminally ill. Now can we please talk about my fever?

    Doctor (calls his father): Papa, I'm joining our family's snacks business from tomorrow!

    Thanks to Doctor Google most of the patients are Digital Patients these days.
  • Stopping the leaks A urologist in New York had a leak in his bathroom on a Sunday. He called a plumber who charged him a $50 call out fee plus another $100 for fixing the problem in 15 minutes. The urologist was shocked and...
  • The Blind Skydiver A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him, "I am placed in the door with my seeing eye dog and told when to jump...
  • The Broken Vase Abe was well known for his cheapness and his `eye for a bargain`. One day he was looking for a cheap wedding present for his niece, so he went into a thrift shop. As he was walking around, he noticed what was previously...
  • Lost in the Desert A man is lost in the desert. He used up the last of his water three days ago and he`s lying, gasping, on the sand, when in the distance he suddenly hears a voice calling - `Mush! Mush!` Not trusting his ears he turns...
  • 1-10 Attractiveness Scale I was meeting a friend in a bar and as I went in, I noticed two pretty girls looking at me. "Nine," I heard one whisper as I passed.
    Feeling pleased with myself, I swaggered over to my buddy and told him a girl...