• Hangover !!!

    It was the morning after, and he sat groaning and holding his head.
    "Well, if you hadn`t drunk so much last night you wouldn`t feel so bad now," the wife said tartly.
    "My drinking had nothing to do with it," he answered. "I went to bed feeling wonderful and woke up feeling awful. It was the sleep that did it!"
  • Before brand!

    I happened to be in Stockholm on a business trip last month and was dining in a restaurant. Before ordering my dinner I asked for a whisky.
    "Which is the best Swedish whisky?" I asked the waiter.
    "Sir are you from India?" he asked.
    "Then you must try our very special brand Bofors, it gives you instant kickbacks."
  • Never assume again.....

    There`s this little guy sitting inside a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half-an-hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying.

    The truck driver says: "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I`ll buy you another drink. I just can`t see a man crying."
  • Good Morning!

    The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar.
    "I assume," she snarled, "that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at six o clock in the morning?"
    "There is," he replied, "Breakfast."