|A friend asked a gentleman why he never married?|
Replied the gentleman, "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman... I guess I've been looking for the perfect girl."
"Oh, come on now," said the friend, "Surely you have met at least one girl that you wanted to marry."
"Yes, there was a girl... once. I guess she was the one perfect girl; the only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything... I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me."
"Well, why didn't you marry her," asked the friend.
"Unfortunately, she was looking for the perfect man."
|The story may be manufactured or may be real but great for a good laugh.|
A Singapore millionaire secretly maintained a mistress in Hong Kong, bought a posh sea view apartment (in his own name) for her to live in, plus gave her a monthly allowance of US$5,000.
The house cost him about US$700,000 in 2005, the affair lasted for 5 years.
He sold the house this year for $3.8 million, after they broke up. A quick calculation shows that after 5 years of a fling with the woman, he still had a net gain of $2.8 million plus six years of FREE LOVE.
When his wife found out about this, he offers the $2.8 million to her. But she was still not happy... and she was very mad at him and gave him a big mouthful.
She yelled at him at the top of her voice and said, "BLOODY IDIOT, STUPID FOOL, Why the hell didn't you keep TWO MISTRESSES !!!!
|Tim: I hear you just got married again.|
Sam: Yes, for the fourth time.
Tim: What happened to your first three wives?
Sam: They all died.
Tim: How did that happen?
Sam: My first wife ate poison mushrooms.
Tim: How terrible! And your second?
Sam: She too ate poison mushrooms.
Tim: And your third ate poison mushrooms too?
Sam: Oh, no. She died of a broken neck.
Tim: I see, an accident.
Sam: Not exactly. She wouldn't eat the mushrooms.
|A missionary discovered a tribe of Indians in the Amazon who had never recorded a baptism, confirmation or marriage.|
The missionary soon rectified the situation by baptizing everyone. He also married every beaming couple that walked by.
Later, the tribal chief told the missionary the tribe had never had so much fun. The missionary asked the chief which part they enjoyed the most.
"The marriage service," the chief said, smiling.
"We all got new wives...!"