• The Big Trouble

    The henpecked plumber rang the bell. The master and the mistress of the house came to the door together.

    As they all three stood in the hall, the husband, a methodical man, announced, "I wish, before you go upstairs, to acquaint you with my trouble."

    The plumber shyly dropped his eyes.

    "Pleased to meet yer, ma'am," he mumbled as he held out his hand to the wife.
  • Unlucky Husbands

    Two women friends met after many years.

    "Tell me," said one, "What happened to your son?"

    "My son? the poor, poor lad!" sighed the other. "What an unfortunate marriage he made to a girl who won't do a stitch of work in the house. She won't cook, she won't sew, she won't wash or clean. All she does is sleep and loaf and read in bed. The poor boy even has to bring her breakfast in bed, would you believe it?"

    "That's really awful!"

    "And what about your daughter?"

    "Ah, now she's the lucky one! She married an angel. He won't let her do anything in the house. He has servants to do the cooking and sewing and washing and leaning. And each morning he brings her breakfast in bed, would you believe it? All she does is sleep for as long as she wishes and spends the rest of the day relaxing and reading in bed."
  • In the graveyard!

    An old man and old woman had been married for about 52 years when one day the old woman died. The entire family showed up to the funeral.

    Every day after the funeral the old man would show up at the grave with his dog and spend a few minutes out there. About two months later a priest saw the old man out there with his dog and decided to go talk to the old man.

    "Hello there. You know, we see you come out here every day to visit your wife's grave and we just think that so sweet. We were all wondering if the dog is something that was special to your wife since you always bring it out here with you."

    "No, actually I bring the dog out here to pee on the grave. I'd do it myself, but I'd get arrested for indecent exposure!"
  • A Dog and a Husband!

    Put your wife in a room and lock it.
    Put your dog in another room and lock it !!!
    Open both rooms after 2 - 3 hours and see who is 'Happy' to see you, and who will 'BITE' you !

    (You are advised not to try this at home as these stunts were performed by professionals who are now divorced and living happily with their dog)

    Don't laugh loud... the extended version says...

    Put your husband in a room and lock it.
    Put your dog in another room and lock it !!!
    Open both rooms after 2 - 3 hours and you will be happy to see your dog waiting for you but you be angry looking at your husband sleeping like he never slept before.