|Man: Doctor, my wife is moody all the time, gets angry at me for no reason and never agrees with whatever I say. What could be wrong? Doctor: Everything appears to be normal, so what's your question?|
|Doctor: Depressed because your girlfriend dumped you? Take this tablet, drink a lot of water, sleep well & you'll be fine in the morning. Bartender: Depressed because your girlfriend dumped you? Drink these shots, call her, tell her to buzz off & you'll be fine in the morning. Choose Wisely!|
|Doctors life goals: 1. Become a doctor 2. Marry a doctor 3. Make your kids doctor 4. Get them married to a doctor Engineer life goals: 1. Study engineering 2.Tell your siblings not to study engg. 3. Tell everyone not to study engg. 4. Die watching everyone choosing engg.|
|Doctor: You're so sick.|
Me: But you haven't examined me yet.
Doctor: Yes but I happen to read your posts!
|When my dentist told me that his tank of nitrous oxide was leaking, we just laughed and laughed and laughed!|
|Patient: Doctor, when do you think COVID-19 will be over?|
Doctor: I don't know, I am not much into politics!
|Doctor: You are hot.|
Girl: Oh, thank you!
Doctor: Pagal Aurat Bukhar Hai Tujhe... Heroine Mat Ban!
|Difficulty is, we are facing a Chinese Virus which may not give symptoms, and we are testing with Chinese Kits that may not give results!|
|I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation...|
So he offered to touch-up my X-rays!
|Doctor: Good news! You are going to see your wife again.|
Patient: But she has been dead for 5 years.