• Doctor: Who did this to you?<br/>
Santa: Wife.<br/>
Doctor: Why?<br/>
Santa: She complained that I don't lift even a finger to help her with housework.<br/>
Doctor: Then?<br/>
Santa: It seems I lifted the wrong finger!
    Doctor: Who did this to you?
    Santa: Wife.
    Doctor: Why?
    Santa: She complained that I don't lift even a finger to help her with housework.
    Doctor: Then?
    Santa: It seems I lifted the wrong finger!
  • Santa visited a dentist named Simran. She asked, `Where are you feeling the pain?`<br/>
Santa: Jaw Simran Jaw!
    Santa visited a dentist named Simran. She asked, "Where are you feeling the pain?"
    Santa: Jaw Simran Jaw!
  • Doctor: How many drinks do you have per week?<br/>
Santa: I don't know. I am an alcoholic, not an accountant!
    Doctor: How many drinks do you have per week?
    Santa: I don't know. I am an alcoholic, not an accountant!
  • On Jeeto's birthday, Santa asked her, `Can I get you a diamond necklace, for your birthday?`<br/>
Jeeto: Nothing would please me more.<br/>
So he got her Nothing. Santa will always be grateful to his English teacher!
    On Jeeto's birthday, Santa asked her, "Can I get you a diamond necklace, for your birthday?"
    Jeeto: Nothing would please me more.
    So he got her Nothing. Santa will always be grateful to his English teacher!
  • At Vaccination Centre:</br>
Nurse: Sir Kaun Si Chalegi? Indian, Russian, American?</br>
Santa: Main Soch Raha Tha Pehle Vaccine Lagwa Leta Hun!
    At Vaccination Centre:
    Nurse: Sir Kaun Si Chalegi? Indian, Russian, American?
    Santa: Main Soch Raha Tha Pehle Vaccine Lagwa Leta Hun!
  • Santa: Hello, is this the helpline for alcoholics?</br>
Lady: Yes sir. How can I help you?</br>
Santa: Can you tell me how to make a Pina Colada?
    Santa: Hello, is this the helpline for alcoholics?
    Lady: Yes sir. How can I help you?
    Santa: Can you tell me how to make a Pina Colada?
  • Santa: I call my wife Fitbit.<br/>
Banta: Is it because she's health-conscious?<br/>
Santa: No, it's because whenever she sees me sitting idle, she tells me to move around and do something!
    Santa: I call my wife Fitbit.
    Banta: Is it because she's health-conscious?
    Santa: No, it's because whenever she sees me sitting idle, she tells me to move around and do something!
  • Santa: My boss says that an employee like me is hard to find.<br/>
Banta: Because you're good at your job?<br/>
Santa: No, it's because most of the time I'm in the toilet!
    Santa: My boss says that an employee like me is hard to find.
    Banta: Because you're good at your job?
    Santa: No, it's because most of the time I'm in the toilet!
  • Santa: My wife said that I was wrong about something I told her but I knew I was right. But I kept quiet.<br/>
Banta: Why? You should have told her that she was wrong.<br/>
Santa: I may be right, but I'm definitely not stupid!
    Santa: My wife said that I was wrong about something I told her but I knew I was right. But I kept quiet.
    Banta: Why? You should have told her that she was wrong.
    Santa: I may be right, but I'm definitely not stupid!
  • Santa: My wife drives like lightning.<br/>
Banta: She drives fast?<br/>
Santa: Na, she just hits the trees!
    Santa: My wife drives like lightning.
    Banta: She drives fast?
    Santa: Na, she just hits the trees!