|Doctor: Who did this to you?|
Santa: She complained that I don't lift even a finger to help her with housework.
Santa: It seems I lifted the wrong finger!
|Santa visited a dentist named Simran. She asked, "Where are you feeling the pain?"|
Santa: Jaw Simran Jaw!
|Doctor: How many drinks do you have per week?|
Santa: I don't know. I am an alcoholic, not an accountant!
|On Jeeto's birthday, Santa asked her, "Can I get you a diamond necklace, for your birthday?"|
Jeeto: Nothing would please me more.
So he got her Nothing. Santa will always be grateful to his English teacher!
|At Vaccination Centre: Nurse: Sir Kaun Si Chalegi? Indian, Russian, American? Santa: Main Soch Raha Tha Pehle Vaccine Lagwa Leta Hun!|
|Santa: Hello, is this the helpline for alcoholics? Lady: Yes sir. How can I help you? Santa: Can you tell me how to make a Pina Colada?|
|Santa: I call my wife Fitbit.|
Banta: Is it because she's health-conscious?
Santa: No, it's because whenever she sees me sitting idle, she tells me to move around and do something!
|Santa: My boss says that an employee like me is hard to find.|
Banta: Because you're good at your job?
Santa: No, it's because most of the time I'm in the toilet!
|Santa: My wife said that I was wrong about something I told her but I knew I was right. But I kept quiet.|
Banta: Why? You should have told her that she was wrong.
Santa: I may be right, but I'm definitely not stupid!
|Santa: My wife drives like lightning.|
Banta: She drives fast?
Santa: Na, she just hits the trees!