|Banta: I wake up every morning depressed. Any idea what this condition is called?|
|Santa: My wife knows me so well that she finishes my sentences. Banta: Wow, so romantic. But how's it even possible? Santa: Super easy, she just says `Shut up`!|
|Banta: What is the difference between 'Paneer Masala' and 'Paneer Tikka Masala'? Santa: The latter one is vaccinated!|
|Banta: 14th February Ko Kya Hai? Santa: Tere Paas Biwi Hai Ya Girlfriend? Banta: Biwi. Santa: To Phir Sunday Hai!|
|Santa: My wife always tells me those three words. Banta: I love you? Santa: No, Stop Embarrassing Me!|
|Boss: I find it highly suspicious that you are only sick on weekdays. Santa: It must be my 'weekend' immune system!|
|Doctor: Who did this to you? Santa: Wife Doctor: Why? Santa: She complained that I don't lift even a finger to help her with housework. Doctor: Then? Santa: It seems I lifted the wrong finger!|
|At a Police Station: Santa: I want to talk to the thief who broke into my house last night. Police Officer: Why do you want to talk to him? Santa: I just want to know how he got into my house without waking up my wife. I've been trying it for years!|
|Santa: Hey, this is not fair. You only call when you need something from me.|
Bank Employee: Mister, your loan installment is overdue!
|Banta: OMG, you have a black eye. Who did that to you?|
Santa: My wife.
Banta: I thought she was at her parents' home.
Santa: That's what I thought too!