|Boss: I find it highly suspicious that you are only sick on weekdays. Santa: It must be my 'weekend' immune system!|
|Doctor: Who did this to you? Santa: Wife Doctor: Why? Santa: She complained that I don't lift even a finger to help her with housework. Doctor: Then? Santa: It seems I lifted the wrong finger!|
|At a Police Station: Santa: I want to talk to the thief who broke into my house last night. Police Officer: Why do you want to talk to him? Santa: I just want to know how he got into my house without waking up my wife. I've been trying it for years!|
|Santa: Hey, this is not fair. You only call when you need something from me.|
Bank Employee: Mister, your loan installment is overdue!
|Banta: OMG, you have a black eye. Who did that to you?|
Santa: My wife.
Banta: I thought she was at her parents' home.
Santa: That's what I thought too!
|Banta: What did you get on Christmas?|
Santa: My wife went to buy a Christmas present for me but then she saw a beautiful purse. So she bought a pair of shoes for her!
|Jeeto: You tell a man something, it goes into one ear and comes out of the other.|
Santa: You tell a woman something, it goes into both ears and comes out of the mouth!
|While in this farmers' protest Santa was cornered by the media.|
Media: What are you protesting for?
Santa: The govt should remove the three laws and keep only one law.
Media: You mean remove the recent 3 farm laws?
Santa: No. the Mother-in-law, the Father-in-law and the Brother-in-law.
Media: And which law should be kept?
Santa: Only Sister-in-law!
|Jeeto: What is your New Year's resolution?|
Santa: I don't know. You haven't told me!
|Santa: My wife and I share the same passion.|
Santa: I want to travel and she wants me to go away!