• You're Going to Die!

    A tourist asked a boat guide: Do you know Psychology, Geography, Geology and Criminology?

    The Guide said 'No' to all the questions.

    The Tourist then said: Idiot!!! You will die of Illiteracy.

    Suddenly the boat started sinking and the Guide asked the Tourist: Do you know Swimology... Escapology away from Crocrodielogy?

    The Tourist said: No.

    The Guide Said: Today you will Drowncology... Crocodielogy will eat your Bodycology... and you will Diecology because of your bad Mouthocology.
  • Perfect Marriage Material

    Pappu is 33 years old and still single. One day, a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?"

    Pappu replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them."

    His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution. Just find a girl who's just like your mother."

    A few months later, they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?"

    With a frown on his face, Pappu answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much."

    The friend said, "Then what's the problem?"

    Pappu replied, "Now my father doesn't like her."
  • Ready For Marriage!

    Son: Dad, I want to get married.
    Father: First, tell me you're sorry.
    Son: For what?
    Father: Say sorry...
    Son: But for what ? What did I do?
    Father: Just say sorry...
    Son: But...what have I done wrong ?
    Father: Say sorry!
    Son: WHY?
    Father: Say sorry!!
    Son: Please, just tell me why?
    Father: Say sorry!!!
    Son: OK, Dad... I'm sorry!
    Father: There you are ! Now you are ready... your training is complete. When you learn to say sorry for no reason at all, then you're ready to get married!
  • Papa Hain Vo Tere...

    Girlfriend- Mere Papa Mujhe Saara Din Guss Karte Rehte Hain... Hamesha Daantte Rehte Hain.

    Boyfriend- Koi Bat Nahi Yaar, Papa Hain Vo Tere.

    Girlfriend: Lekin Din Bhar Chillate Rehte Hain Mujhpe... Chup Hone Ka Naam Hi Lete.

    Boyfriend Jaanu, Koi Baat Nahin... Papa Hain Vo Tere.

    Girlfriend: But Bina Vajah Ke Daantna Bhi Theek Nahin Hai Na Yaar...

    Boyfriend Arey Jaane Bhi Do Yaar... Papa Hain Vo Tere.

    Girlfriend: Tum Bhi Unki Hi Side Loge..... Meri Toh Koi Value Hi Nhain Hai Tumhare Liya...

    Boyfriend Achcha... Bula Toh Usko... Aisi Taisi Na Kar Di Us Buddhe Ki Aaj Toh Mera Naam Badal Dena... Tum Bulao Toh Sahi Ek Baar Us Kamine Khoosat Ko... Aaj Uski Kabr Khod Hi Deta Hun Mein... Hamesh Pareshaan Karta Rehta Hai Meri Jaan Ko... Bula Bula Us Kutte Ko...

    Girlfriend: Gaali Mat Do Jaanu... Papa Hain Vo Mere

    Boyfriend: Mein Bhi Toh Itni Der Se Yahi Bata Raha Tha Tumko... Ki Papa Hain Vo Tere..