Mature Jokes

A guy and a girl are lying in a room after just having sex. The girl lays on her side of the bed and rests. The guy goes to his side of the bed and says to himself, "Man, oh Man I finally did it! I`m no longer a virgin....

A salesman came across a house that had a large number of cars parked outside it. Intrigued, he stopped and decided to sell his double glazing to the owner. Answering the door was a gorgeous young woman, and the salesman started...

"You don`t look so good today, Bambi," said Barbie.
"You`re right," said Bambi. "I feel like I`m coming down with something. My throat really hurts."
Barbie suggested, "You know, whenever I have a sore throat...

A prostitute with a single room decided she would get a partition installed so she could entertain 2 clients at once. A builder knocked up the partition in no time, and after he`d finished, he asked for his money. The girl...

Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says, "I hear that you`ve been telling people that I`m ugly!"
"Oh, no! I`ve just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive....

A man died and went to hell and was sitting on a stone looking very depressed. Another demon came up to him and asked, "Why the glum look, man?"
The man replied, "Well I just died and now I`m in hell...

8 things we`ve learned from Watching Porn:
1. Women wear high heels to bed.
2. Men are never Impotent.
3. Women always Orgasm at...

A popular Baptist preacher, who on Sunday morning announces to the congregation that he will not renew his contract, and is moving on to a larger congregation that will pay him more. There is a hush. No one wants him...

A guy goes to a travel agent and books a two-week cruise for himself and his girlfriend. A couple of days before the cruise, the travel agent phones and says the cruise has been canceled, but he can get them on a three-day cruise instead...