Clean Jokes

A man attempted to rob a Bank of America located in San Francisco. He walked into the branch and wrote, "This iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag."
While standing in line, waiting to...

Working at the post office, I`m used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What`s the trouble?"
"I went out this morning," she...

Saudi Arabia is banning chess, calling it Haram. Reasons are:
1. Queen doesn`t wear burkha.
2. Queen roams freely wherever it wants...

A lady is having a bad day at the table in Monte Carlo. Down to her last Pound 100, completely exasperated, she cries, "What rotten luck! What in the world should I do now?"
A gent next to her, trying to calm her...

At a party in an MNC the boss ordered a young junior lady Officer to say a joke to all. The lady Officer didn`t like the way he ordered and his attitude. But finally she agreed for a joke. See what she said....

Dobbins lost his eye in an accident and couldn`t afford the price of a glass eye. So he carved one out of wood. But he was so self-conscious that he never left the house. Finally, his friend Eddy came over and forced him to...

Stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson. Be very sure you get this brand. When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and...

A sign in a shoe repair store:
We will heel you,
We will save your sole,
We will even dye for you.
Sign over a Gynaecologist`s Office: Dr. Jones, at your cervix...

A group of guys, all aged about 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant, because the waitresses there were pretty. Ten years later, at age 50...

Grandma was outside pulling weeds on a hot summer day when her grandpa walked up and asked her what they were having for dinner.
Irritated by the thought...