Clean Jokes

Beer and ice will give you hangovers.
Vodka and ice will ruin your kidneys.
Rum and ice will ruin your liver...

Start with a cage containing five apes. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, an ape will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana...

If you can convince a female in less than 5 minutes then she is your mom.
If you can convince a female in 15 minutes then she is your sister.
If you can convince...

A man who makes coffin was on his way to deliver one of his coffins when his car broke down. Trying not to be late he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his...

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: Is the reason you have no food.
FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days...

A King of a Kingdom called his Prime Minister and asked, like there are Brilliant people in his State will there be Idiots available?
Minister said there will be...

A competition to see who can come up with the best lexphillies is held every year in an undisclosed location. This year`s winning submission is posted at the very end....

1: Notice at Church: Do not leave your mobile, purses, wallets, hand-bags, girlfriends unattended; others may think it is an answer to their prayers...

Do you know the relation between two eyes...???
They never see each other... BUT, 1. They blink together.
2. They move together...

I like duck. Duck lives in water. I also drink water. My neighbour uncle drink alcohol. Alcohol is very bad. It was told by Gandhiji. He was a good person. He had one stick...