• Kanjoosi Ki Hadd!

    Ek Admi Maha Kanjus Tha! Usne Ek Martbaan Mein Desi Ghee Bhar Kar Usko Kas Ke Band Kar Diya.

    Kyunki Kanjoos Darta Tha Ki Uska Ghee Khatam Na Ho Jaye Isliye Jab Bhi Vo Aur Uske Bete Khana Khaate Toh Roti Ko Martbaan Se Ragad Lete Aur Khana Kha Lete The.

    Ek Baar Kanjoos Kisi Kaam Ke Silsile Mein Shahar Se Bahar Gaya.

    Waapas Aane Pe Use Apne Beton Se Pucha: Tum Logon Ne Khana Time Se Kha Liya Tha Na?

    Bete Bole: Ji Pita Ji.

    Kanjoos: Bina Ghee Ke Koi Mushkil Toh Nahin Hui? Kyunki Ghee Ka Martbaan Toh Almari Mein Band Kar Ke Gaya Tha.

    Bete: Vo Humne Almari Ke Handle Se Rotiyaan Ragad Kar Kha Lee.

    Kanjoos: Nalayakon!!! Kya Tum Log Ek Di N Bhi Bina Ghee Ke Khaana Nahin Kha Sakte?

    Bete Behosh!!!
  • The Perils of Illiteracy

    A man attempted to rob a Bank of America located in San Francisco.

    He walked into the branch and wrote, "This iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag."

    While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to Wells Fargo.

    After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest tool in the box, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America.

    Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK," and left.

    He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at the Bank of America.
  • You've Got Mail

    Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?"

    "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. I'll have you know, my husband was in all morning! He never heard a thing!"

    After apologizing, I got her parcel.

    "Oh good!" she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages!"

    "What is it?" I asked.

    "My husband's new hearing aid."
  • Chess is Haram

    Saudi Arabia is banning chess, calling it Haram. Reasons are:

    1. Queen doesn't wear burkha.

    2. Queen roams freely wherever it wants.

    3. Queen is more powerful than King.

    4. Queen alone goes to other army's side.

    5. And... Most importantly there's only one queen...